2013-11-07 / Lifestyles

Jest for Fun

Lois A. Corcoran Lois A. Corcoran I did a double take while scanning the program for a religious service I attended. It announced that a member planned to read “Psalms,” but it left out the first “s,” which gave the activity a whole ‘nother meaning.

In a similar vein, a cake celebrating the receipt of a sacrament offered the message, “Congratulations on your conformation!” What a big change that must have been.

Another bakery, in a serious lack of communication with its customer, made a cake reading “Happy Birthday Sheri with an eye!”

Holiday newsletters from spelling challenged acquaintances can be entertaining, too. Last year we received one that greeted us with, “Mary Christmas!” The author went on to describe his wife’s surgery and the sympathy she garnered “after words.”

Then there was the health bulletin I read that addressed those who suffer from “margarine headaches.” I can only hope the advice it dispensed helps them feel “butter”.

We can always count on a smile from the press. In a sports story, a North Dakota newspaper reported that “Bismarck scored three unanswered girls…to defeat Fargo South.” Um, okay.

An Australian newspaper quoted a local as saying that “more than 30,000 pigs have been floating down the Dawson River since last weekend.” Readers learned the following day that he actually said “30 sows and pigs.”

Businesses provide plenty of booboos, too. The ad for an Atlanta trophy company offered engraving on awards and “plagues”.

And on its vacancy sign, an Oregon motel advertised “Affable Rates”. Nice to know they’re friendly.

In its newspaper ad, a bridal gown boutique promised customers “A prefect wedding”. Speaking of nuptials, I chuckled over a review that mentioned the “cumber bound” worn by a groom.

E-mail misspellings continue to prompt laughs on a regular basis. Like the message from my homeschool group organizing a “filed” trip.

A friend messaged me that she intends to look on the brighter side from now on rather than “focusing on pretty grievances.” Her beefs must be more attractive than mine.

My brother’s new iPhone has been the source of some great typos. Recently he shared with me a message he sent to his daughter, whom he invited for pizza at “Grandma Pat’s” house. But he inadvertently typed “Pants”.

And I browsed a forum where someone wrote, “He’s always bragging about how good he is. What a conceded jerk.” No doubt everyone agreed.

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