2013-10-17 / Lifestyles

Jest for Fun

Lois A. Corcoran Lois A. Corcoran My favorite time of day is actually night. More accurately, that moment when I crawl between the sheets, relieved at having survived another day.

Generally speaking, that relief is short lived. More often than not, I wake up in the wee morning hours from circumstances beyond my control. Like the passing train that made my bed vibrate the other night.

Things in general bother me more at that hour than during the day. This is especially true of sounds. I barely notice a neighbor’s dog barking all afternoon, but come twilight it’s obvious as heck.

Problems also seem amplified. Trivial conversations that took place earlier in the day suddenly go through this life-or-death analysis. Like, where’s Dr. Phil when you need him?

Head colds are infinitely more miserable at night than during the day. Just when one nasal passage clears, the other one gets blocked.

Sleeping position can be an issue whether I’m sick or not. Laying on my back is sure to conjure up nightmares. So I turn from one side to the other and back again like a revolving door.

I’m more aware of long toenails in bed, too. It’s hard to ignore them when they’re perpendicular to the sheet and threatening to stab a hole through it.

Still, I’m not inclined to get up at that hour and clip them. I avoid “anything” that takes me to the main floor, knowing the return trip will rev up my heartbeat.

Sleep experts say we should also resist the urge to check the clock. Knowing how much time we’re wasting in bed won’t help us sleep any better.

We should avoid other things as well. I used to wonder why I never slept well when I wore a certain pair of PJ’s. Finally came to realize the waistband was too tight. The elastic imprint on my skin clued me in.

Flickering screens of any kind should also be banned before bedtime. That means everything from movie theater size to the itty bitty ones on an iPod. I’ve known this for awhile but have yet to put it into practice.

I do, however, heed the warnings about caffeine and alcohol before retiring. Not that it’s done any good.

In fact, that’s all the more reason to hit the hay sooner. If I go any earlier, my favorite time of day will be afternoon.

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